Contentment

Contentment - "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content."  Philippians 4:11
"In the world of the Greek Stoic philosopher, the world Paul traveled in, the term "content" was used to describe independence, self-sufficiency, and the ability to go it alone.  The idea was that the truly wise person was the one who had come to the place in his or her life where they were independent of all things and all people.  They needed nothing and no one.  When you arrived at the place where you depended on no one but yourself, then to the Greek Stoic philosopher, you had arrived.
On the other hand in Paul's vocabulary, written in a letter to the Philippians, being content means simply "having enough," whether his personal economics were bullish or bearish.  His contentment did not come from himself or his circumstances; it came, he says, from God's strengthening."

This morning I was thinking how content I felt in my life right now and was so very thankful how God is caring for me since losing Tom 1 1/2 year ago already.  It still hits to me at times that I miss him so much and wish he was back in my life but in the same breath of thought I realize I love his brother!  It is a very strange phenomenon how both things can be a part of my life.  God keeps reminding me that I can be content in the places He has called me to walk.  So this morning again as I picked up one of my devotionals written by David Walls I enjoyed reading about the very subject I was pondering.  Those verses go on to discuss the secret of being content in any and every situation whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. (I might add in sorrow and joy.) Paul states he can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Jesus is the one who gives us strength to carry on in life no matter what we have to face.  Life is full of tough things but in between there are flowers blooming that we may not want to miss.  I don't want to miss these years of love I get to receive as well as give while health and sound minds are still with John and I.  We have had a wonderful time enjoying these first months of marriage and growing in understanding each other better.

We are very blessed to have so much family close, children, grandchildren, and now two great grandchildren.  John and I realize we need to give each day to the Lord and ask Him to guide our steps to where He would lead us.  Sometimes we seem to have choices but the older I become I realize each day seems to play out in many ways I did not expect or have control over.  That can be very frustrating or we can try to look at what God may be wanting to teach us to be content in.  It's a much happier way to live that's for sure!

The fun news is John has a sweet great grand daughter with a middle name after his wife and I have a new great grandson named after my sweet Tom.  They are both adorable and bring us great joy!    Babies grow so very quickly.  There is nothing quite like holding them and we make sure we find excuses to do that! :)

It can be difficult to be content when life goes all wrong and still many of our friends battle cancer and have lost loved ones.  My daughter's mother in law, Betty, is submitting to major surgery a second time after a fall suffered in Holland.  It is very difficult to feel contentment in the middle of pain and fear of how you will feel after a second surgery when the first one did not seem to do the job!  We pray for this precious woman of God who is a sister in the Lord with us, as well as part of my daughter's family.

We continue to wait in expectancy for that place where all our tears and fears will be wiped away!  May the truth of Jesus death and resurrection touch you in a new way this Easter!

Days of Joy and the Fear Factor

Here it is February already!  Marriage so far is a great thing in my life!  One thing I learned about myself in the last 2 1/2 years is marriage was a wonderful blessing.  When life is so full of love and you enjoy being a wife it is missed so very much when lost.  God has filled me with such joy by replacing that gapping hole that being a widow caused.  My heart goes out to everyone who is single that desires marriage.  Remarriage, or marriage in general, can be a pretty tricky thing if one does not live close to the ways of God.  I'm not an expert counselor, but I have learned a lot over the years of how to make a man happy as well as myself by going God's way. I Corinthians 13:4-7 is the best example and our wedding passage!

"Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Do we always act this way perfectly?  No, but it is a great reference point!  I can say Tom was a very easy man to apply these verses to and his brother is also very easy to live with!!  Hurrah!!

John and I have had a very busy first 4 months of marriage beginning with the holidays and after that doing some traveling and also having a sweet young woman, Cristina, making her home with us until she can get on her feet.  She works and goes to college and needs a little extra support till she can move out on her own.  Today living expenses can be very costly.  So John and I joke with her that we still have a child in our home.  John and I also have been blessed to experience another aspect of life-becoming great grandparents!  Kaylyn was born in December, a baby boy is expected next month, and finally another baby (they don't want to know gender) will arrive in June!  WOOHOO!!  God is good!

Even though God has been so very good in many ways I can catch myself being fearful.  Anyone else like me?  Fear I have discovered can undo the good things in life!  I can be afraid that I'm just not good enough for God, or is God really waiting to take us to heaven at death, or what if another of my family is taken from me, or my new husband dies!!!!  Oh so many things can pop into my mind when least expected! The middle of the night is the worse time! These thoughts can put such a damper on a happy day or a good sleeping night!  I don't think I'm the only one who has ridiculous fears.  I do think as these fears hit me I've learned to recognize they are lies of the devil!  I have discovered over the years the best way to face the fears is with God's Word.  My favorite verse from the King James Version is
2 Timothy 1:7  "God has not given us the spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." Look also at how Jesus used scripture to chase away the devils lies and the devil himself in Matthew 4:1-11.  When I first realized this several years back I was very excited.  All of scripture (the Bible) is God breathed and has great power to rid us of any doubt or fear we may have!  This is especially good for fearful people like me!  One day I was thinking about this fear thing and in my reading from the Psalms that day in the 34th Psalm verse 4 I read -"I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears."  I feel sure that this is the absolute truth since I have experienced it so many times!  Seek God and He is the one to deliver us from our fears.  They may come back (as I know mine will) but I have the answer and I won't stop using the weapon of the Word to overcome!

Know and remember we are one day Expected in Heaven!!!  Have NO FEAR!

Vera & John

Vera & John

Here is our wedding album for those of you who would love to see our wedding pictures!  It was a great day weather wise and all.  We felt very blessed and loved.  All you need to do to see the album is click on  "Vera & John"  above.  We hope you enjoy the story they tell!

New Beginnings

Finally I'm taking some time to write!  I noticed I have not written anything since November 20, 2013.  Time certainly has a way of flying by, especially when life is good and there is plenty of happy things going on.  Yes that is the feeling I've had the last few months - happiness.  Is it because I never remember Tom or don't mourn his loss, no not at all.  It is because I have great hope in Jesus and because He has given me a very wonderful new husband in John, Tom's brother.  We share loss in the fact that we both lost our spouses, but we also share great faith in the hope we will see them again in heaven and feel daily the comfort only God can give us through the faith we have in Jesus.  This has been our experience as well as the enjoyment of discovering new love together.

What have we been up to?  Well after our marathon Thanksgiving Day with my family we went to southern California and celebrated Thanksgiving again with our foster daughter's family and also an early Christmas.  Going back home we prepared for Christmas and had three parties - two at our house and one with John's family at his grandson's home.  Then John and I took off for Alabama and another Christmas celebration with my sister's family which we finished in Nashville to celebrate the New Year.  After all this we both felt so blessed to have a large family and have the health to travel to all these places and sound minds to socialize this often.  We had some great adventures as my sister lost power in her house minutes before her Christmas dinner was cooked.  It was able to finish with the heat still in the oven and the food was amazing.  We enjoyed 3 1/2 hours by candlelight and flashlights eating and opening gifts.  We were also thankful that day was not the 16 degrees that came a week later.  Brrrr!  John and I left the day before their 1 degree temperature in Nashville, it was only 18 degrees and we learned how to scape a windshield as well as deal with frozen water bottles but we made it to our flight on time and back to sunny California.  Actually it's too sunny here!  We are praying and praying for some rain.  We really take for granted our power and water and food most of the time in America!

John and I never want to take our health for granted or life itself as we both know it can change in a flash.  Three friends have lost their spouses this past year and we grieve anew with each one knowing just what they are going through.  Two weeks ago John lost his last living sibling, his sweet sister Margie.  Then the other day our foster family lost a very healthy father riding a bike and being hit by a car!  Another widow alone and kids and grandkids without that special person in their lives!  We know life is fragile and we believe we must handle with prayer. We need to cling to verses like 2 Corinthians  4:16 - 18 "Therefore we do not lose heart.  Though outwardly we are wasting  away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

I believe in Jesus, that He came to die for our wrongs to make us right with God and make us acceptable for heaven.  He rose from the grave and after many people were eye witnesses to his coming back to life, they also saw Him ascend into heaven where He waits for the day He will come again to make a perfect Kingdom.  Revelation 21:4 "He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."
I don't know about you but I can't wait!  It gives lots of hope for everyone who has gone through sickness and death.

May you all have this wonderful hope of being expected in heaven!

Married again!!

"God is the God of divine reversals.  He can glean good out of evil:  His master plan brings victory out of apparent defeat.  Come to Jesus just as you are - wounded from battle - and expose your wounds to His healing light.  You need to spend ample time with Jesus, opening yourself fully to His living Presence..... When you experience a divine reversal in your life, you are thrilled to observe how masterfully I operate in the world.  Your suffering gains meaning because you know I can - and do - bring good out of evil.  Ultimately, His plans will not be thwarted.  He has the last word!  As you see how utterly beyond you is His wisdom and ways, you get a glimpse of Jesus Glory.  As you open your soul to Jesus in worship, you gain assurance of His unfailing Love."
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord,"plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:1

This is part of my devotion for today from the Jesus Lives book by Sarah Young.  I shared it with you because I couldn't help think it was a good application to the changes my own life has experienced.

Many of you have kept up with me for the last two years first on care pages watching my husband Tom and I go through the terrible illness of acute leukemia.  Then continuing to follow my walk after he passed away in September of 2012.  Many of you know that his brother lost his wife a few weeks after Tom passed away.  We walked together as families in sorrow and were there for each other for comfort since both our families have lived in the same town together for over 40 years and known each other for 50 years.  Many friends and family were therefore not surprised when John and I started dating.  We were, but it seemed everyone else was just cheering us on in the sidelines.

October 28, just three weeks and four days ago John and I knew we were ready to say "I do love you too".  We both know that just because we knew we loved each other the love for our first spouse does not go away or the grief.  We are thankful for the learning we were able to do together over the last year as we comforted each other and did studies on grief together, which really helped to get to know each other in special ways.  After these beginning weeks of marriage we feel so very blessed and have enjoyed so much together!  We were married with family and a couple dear friends who played an important part in our getting together.  We were delighted with three pastors who helped to marry us as the beautiful Koetsier Ranch.  They filled our time with laughter as they joked about what our children would call us now, with uncles and aunts becoming mom and dad or grandpa and grandma and cousins becoming sisters and brothers!!  It can be confusing indeed when we introduce one another.   It has been a bit of a whirlwind to say the least in the last two years with a tremendous amount of sadness to be followed with a great measure of hope and comfort and happiness.  The above devotion says so well what God often does in our lives to give us hope to carry on.  He doesn't always do this in the same way that is for sure.  John and I were both so surprised that our spouses passed away so close together and then that we found such warm friendship together.  I can speak for both of us that we went into marriage with a little fear and trepidation because to start over - even with someone you've known all your life - can be very frightening after 48 and 53 years with others.  God is so good and since we share alike faith in our sweet Lord and Savior we know this is a huge reason we get along so well.  I feel for myself I have so much happiness back in my life.  A dear one to share all the ups and downs of life and spend time sharing and talking with no empty house or bed to come home to.

We both know that this life is very short and someday we will have to face grief again - death can't be escaped.  It is why we place much treasure in our heavenly bank!  Without it we would not have the hope we do, to see our spouses again or be "expected in heaven".

Expected in Heaven - Are You Sure???

This past weekend I had an awesome privilege to speak to about 40 women at a retreat center in Seabeck, WA.  The topic I chose was (you guessed it) "Expected in Heaven"!  I should say God chose it since I felt so much of this weekend was God's doing.  The only reason or maybe the main reason I was asked to do this was because of my past two year walk with my husband's illness and death and the way God moved in my heart as well as my husband to share what we were going through together and later me walking alone with God.

God is totally in charge of my life and I know I must surrender it to Him and trust so I can be a much happier person.  I admit I tend to be a worrier so when I was asked to speak I felt VERY inadequate.  God kept making me feel like it was the right thing to do and showed me through a study of 1&2 Corinthians that was letters of Paul filled with great info to teach on.  I spent the year digging into those letters as well as lots of scripture that supports Paul's teaching.

I discovered Paul felt the same way, when writing to believers, as I did when I found I Corinthians 2:1-5.  Here is how those verses read in my mind:  "When I come to you, sisters, I do not come with eloquence or superior wisdom as I proclaim the testimony about God.  For I resolve to know nothing while I am with you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified.  I come in weakness and fear and with much trembling.  My message and my preaching are not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power, so that your faith might not rest on a woman's wisdom, but on God's power."

Now back home the blessings of the weekend keep showing up.  God blessed us with several women who had also lost loved ones in death.  There were others having to deal with the struggles life often brings our way.  Our weekend taught us that the sufferings we have teach us that blessings can come out of tears.  What happens when we turn to God with those sufferings is that He comforts us and then we in turn can comfort others who go through the same thing!  2 Corinthians 1:3-7 teach us that.

Another very important fact I know the Bible teaches us is we can be very SURE we are expected in heaven when we know the way.  That is why I chose to do sessions on Sin, Salvation, and Service.  We must realize we are sinners in order to know we need a Savior.  Jesus is that Savior who loves us so much that He died for us and rose again.  We need to realize He has paid the price for sin and His love is a FREE gift for us to receive!  The service part comes in out of gratitude not out of trying to earn anything.  It comes naturally since we love our Savior and want to live for Him because of what He did for us.

Today I happen to know someone had the privilege to lead someone else to Jesus!!  What a blessing!  The question came up from this person - what if a family member does not believe in Jesus will I see them in heaven?  This is such a hard question and often gets Christians in a lot of trouble, but which is worse to tell someone a lie and they end up in hell because we did not want to make them feel bad??  In the Bible Jesus clearly teaches He is the only way to Heaven.  He is a free gift we can choose to receive or we can say we don't really need Him because we would rather try to work our way to heaven on our own merit.  The devil wants us to believe that we need to be our own gods and work our way to heaven.  He still deceives like he deceived Eve!  (Genesis 3:3-5)  God did not REALLY say you would die if you eat the fruit He said not to, it will only make you wiser and you will be LIKE God!!  Today Satan likes to deceive the same way by saying Jesus isn't REALLY the only way to heaven, surly your life is good enough or this other religion that has such good teachings about works is a good way to go.  Look closely at John 14:1-7, John 10:9-11, John 5:24, John 3:16-21.  If you read the whole book of John you can't miss the fact that Jesus claims to be God - part of the God head - He is the Son who the Father sent to save us sinners.  We don't deserve such love but He gives it freely and when we receive it and believe Jesus is God and He is our Lord and Savior we can KNOW that we are EXPECTED IN HEAVEN!!

I hope all who read this and don't believe check out the Bible!  All of you who do believe don't be deceived that there is any other way to be saved!  Be a strong witness to the truth and don't be afraid to speak it clearly! Remember when you believe you are God's child and you are then a child of the King of Kings!!  You are a true Prince and Princess and are expected in heaven!!

The Best Love Story of All....

It has been awhile since I last wrote to announce my engagement to my husband's brother John.  We were engaged as of June 28, 2013 and have been very busy since, with our lives that never seem to slow down.  We are glad though to stay involved with work, volunteering, church, and home life.  We are squeezing planning our wedding in between all this.  The date is set for October 26 and it is speeding closer.  I think everyone can get nervous before a big event that is life changing and we are no different.  We both were married for many years and losing those spouses in death was traumatic enough.  Now to begin over again at times can seem a bit overwhelming.  I personally can have some very strong, sure days and then I get hit with grief as well as fear of the future.  God is amazing through all this and one day He gave me this that I hope blesses you as it did me:

My grace is sufficient for you, but it's sufficiency is for one day at a time.  That's why it is essential for you to learn how to live in the present.
Your mind so easily slips into the future, where worries abound.  You also spend way too much time analyzing the past.  Meanwhile, splendors of the present moment parade before you, and you don't even notice.  Part of the problem is your tendency to strive for self-sufficiency.  I will help you learn to rest in My sufficiency, depending on Me more and more.
You need My grace in order to live in the present.  Grace is all about My provision for you, but accepting that goes against the grain of your natural tendencies.  Each day you face a number of situations requiring My help.  Moment by moment I proffer to you the needed assistance.  Your part is to recognize you neediness and receive what I offer.
My Presence is with you always, providing everything you need.  So don't worry about tomorrow's needs.  My sufficiency is for a day at a time--today!

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.  Psalm 34:5
And God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:19
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.  Matthew 6:34

From: "Jesus Lives" by Sarah Young and the Bible NIV version

I know the above information well since for the last two years I have experienced it so many times!  God takes care of me every time I cry out to Him and always leads me where He wants me to be but only day at a time.  I was thinking this morning how God's ways (which you discover by reading and studying the Bible) make so much sense!  Nothing in this world we learn fits life like God and His word!  I mean nothing!  We all have trouble in this life, there is no escaping it, but God is there for us waiting with all the answers we need (even if they are not always what we like).  Now that I have experienced life and death with the loss of someone so close to me, I know even more surely that my ONLY COMFORT in life and in death is Jesus!  He is the way to the certainty that after death there is still life!  How awesome is that!!  I expect to see Tom again and John expects to see Marlys again and we both expect to see all those who followed Jesus and His promises!  And best of all we will be expected by Jesus our faithful Lord and Savior!

John and I have a sweet love story now but the best love story of all is Jesus and His love for us!  I hope all who read this are EXPECTED IN HEAVEN!!