This blog is named "Expected In Heaven". I recently wondered if people understand what that means. Well this is what it means to me.
I just finished looking back over the years of writing on care pages and this blog. I also completed a novel called, "Expected In Heaven - the story". It's available on Amazon or you can ask for it at a book store. 😊The path God has brought me down is one I never expected to walk. I think most of us have dreams of what our life should look like and then we set out to accomplish that. Now there is nothing wrong with this, I don't think it's wrong to make plans, but it's not always what happens. Almost 10 years have passed since my first sweet husband went home to heaven, September 28, 2012. His leukimia was deadly but God gave him many miracles along the way and we enjoyed his life for 10 months. I did not expect to be a widow that soon, nor did I expect to marry again. I happened to marry two more times, losing both to cancer, one 6 years ago and one 3 years ago. It has indeed been a journey. A very unexpected journey.
In the last decade I believe I have learned things about God I never knew or fully understood before this time in life. In a devotion I wrote recently for my church I said it could be compared to having a child. Before you give birth for the first time you can study a lot and be told much from other mothers but until you experience birth yourself you don't know how you will feel. So it is with death of a loved one, especially a spouse that you share all of life with in intimate ways. I watched so many people go through it and never understood the grief until it hit me.
This was a part of life I had not planned or expected, let alone three times! I like a comment my pastor made at a recent memorial service. He said his answer to someone who asked what a pastor's job is was, "to prepare them for death." I liked that a lot! It says exactly what my title means to me and I hope to anyone who reads this blog.
We must prepare, expect, never stop asking God for help. I always knew this to be true but wondered if I would be able to believe this if a tragedy struck and if my faith would hold up to believe God could help. I was able to get my answers over the past decade. I discovered three things mainly:
1. I had to spend time with God alone. Seek Him in prayer and His Word the Bible. Ask questions that no one could answer but Him. Let tears flow so I could be free and not be afraid to feel the grief. I was often amazed with the answers and comfort I found. This was not a one and done thing, it had to be daily to be effective. Sometimes my heart was too broken to feel but my head knowledge was there and when I preserved with God my heart caught up with the head.
2. I needed to plan things for myself involving fun times with family or friends. I couldn't wait for people to think of me, I had to initiate what I thought I might enjoy. People don't know what you need unless you tell them and invite them to be part of your healing.
3. Participate in grief classes or counseling is helpful too as needed. There are often helpful things online or pastors can help guide you to the right source.
Life is important to live, for Jesus doesn't want us to dread life instead He wants us to live it to the full. John 10:10b "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." The good news is that after we have lived, we can have the assurance that if we believe in Jesus, we can expect eternal life!! Are you expecting heaven? Until that day I encourage you to walk the path of life with me and lean on Jesus each day taking time in His Word the Bible and prayer. 💗
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